[434] The Downward Spiral

Any worthwhile fiction โฃโฃ
should be a combinationโฃโฃ
of two things โฃโฃ
a reflection of the realityโฃโฃ
and a depiction of how it should beโฃโฃ
โฃโฃ
๐˜™๐˜ฆ๐˜ง๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ค๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜บโฃโฃ
โฃโฃ
Voices raised โฃโฃ
under the influenceโฃโฃ
leads to other voicesโฃโฃ
being silencedโฃโฃ
When your powerโฃโฃ
makes the other personโฃโฃ
question their everyday โฃโฃ
little habits like the wayโฃโฃ
they laugh, the way they smileโฃโฃ
the way they sit, the way they walkโฃโฃ
You need to realise that this โฃโฃ
power does not come from the bottleโฃโฃ
you drink to silence societyโ€™s sins you’ve come fromโฃโฃ
but it comes from the other personโ€™s silence you’ve come toโฃโฃ
When the father figure inheritsโฃโฃ
the destruction of a patriarchal nationโฃโฃ
they donโ€™t realise that weโ€™re merely kidsโฃโฃ
in search of better daysโฃโฃ
So we try to become the better daysโฃโฃ
โฃโฃ
๐˜‹๐˜ฆ๐˜ฑ๐˜ช๐˜ค๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ ๐˜ช๐˜ต ๐˜ด๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆโฃโฃ
โฃโฃ
All my life has been a meditationโฃโฃ
to unlearn the inner rhythm โฃโฃ
of you that I escape to forgetโฃโฃ
A habit I didnโ€™t take toโฃโฃ
is to pick up the bottle โฃโฃ
when a storm is โฃโฃ
raging insideโฃโฃ
while I had just survived the one โฃโฃ
raging outsideโฃโฃ
Instead of giving it an outletโฃโฃ
and silencing the powerlessโฃโฃ
I treat my storm with silenceโฃโฃ
and a glass of water โฃโฃ
to calm my nervesโฃโฃ
even if it leads to an implosionโฃโฃ
even if it leads to the blocking of memoriesโฃโฃ
All not to become โฃโฃ
the melting pot of my traumasโฃโฃ
All not toโฃโฃ
externalise the habitโฃโฃ
I had internalised to silently hateโฃโฃ
All for the hope of better days that I live now


NaPoWriMo Day15: It asks you to think about a small habit you picked up from one of your parents, and then to write a piece that explores an early memory of your parent engaged in that habit, before shifting into writing about yourself engaging in the same habit.

7 responses to “[434] The Downward Spiral”

  1. ‘All not toโฃโฃ
    externalise the habitโฃโฃ
    I had internalised to silently hate’

    I know them passive aggresive genes.
    A great exploration.
    Thanks

    Like

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