[15] Everyone is scared

There is a guy in my classroom; tall, well built and when he speaks words flow out of him like waves hitting the rocks – rock solid.

I have always envied the plethora of confidence he exudes. Never have I doubted his confidence.

But then I see it shatter in front of me. The facade he hides under falling like a car free falling from a cliff. It is like when he sped out of the cliff, he felt like he was flying for a long amount of time. This was the crash that made him realize that he can also crash.

A sadistic thought crossed my mind when I saw him, a reflection of me, where I felt his heart beating faster almost skipping a beat. His eyes like me, fluttering like the wings of a bird, not flying but holding on to the empty space that’s air.

It felt good to see someone this confident shudder in front of me and the fact that he was lying to himself by living in denial of the crash. But I felt bad for him too because I hate myself when I feel like this. He must be feeling that too.

It helped me though, to cope up with my weakness, to see that, even the strongest suffer from the same problems as I. But I hope that I become strong enough to be able to afford to lose my facade of confidence once in a while like him.

So here I am building up a facade before I see it fall.

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