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[557] 9 Year Anniversary of This Blog

The words I read, and the words I write, fall into a pit of a forgetfulness. Or so I thought.
The more effort I take, the more things become difficult.
Ideas spring up only to excite the mind and then vanish from memory
Or so I thought.

9 years ago I began this blog. And I am still going.

My spiritual journey is a journey of reading things, to be in awe, to write about it, and then forget.
Only the feeling remains, but the words are lost to the otherworld.
Or so I thought.

The portal to that knowledge only opens when the air is full
with a certain frequency and life is in abeyance.
But then something shifted.
9 years ago, an attempt to write more was born.
Regardless of inspiration, a hope to be disciplined.

It gave me the opposite feeling of depression, and that is expression.
It honed my voice, curated my thoughts, gave a feeling of release.
It gave my anxiety an outlet, my self-hatred a balm.
It gave me you, who is reading, it gave me me, who is writing.

I never seem to fit in the actionable lessons.
It has always been about the essence of the thing
that captures my imagination at that point.
The past year I did not post a single poem here.
My imagination was in the realm of stories.

I got my first credit as a screenwriter in a web series.
I finally wrote a full length feature film’s first draft.
Yet it didn’t fill me with a sense of satisfaction.
I needed poems to come back.
I needed the otherworldly realm to make sense of my inner life.

And now it is back, and I wish you to give you the same sense of awe
that I receive when words find me.
I wish to make myself better every day and keep writing honest truths
in this age of ambient anxiety that pervades around us.

Words become the writer’s safe haven.
I hope my words becomes yours.

P.S. Hopefully I get the drive to finally have a poetry book sometime next year!

Rahul Gaur

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11 responses to “[557] 9 Year Anniversary of This Blog”

  4. This is breathtakingly beautiful and so deeply resonant. Thank you for sharing this piece of your soul.🤝

    Your words perfectly capture the mysterious, often frustrating, cycle of creation and forgetfulness that so many of us know. That feeling of ideas “vanishing into the otherworld” is one I know well, and you’ve articulated it with such poignant grace. But what shines through even more powerfully is the profound truth you’ve discovered: that the discipline of showing up, of expressing regardless of inspiration, is what forges not just a writer, but a self.

    To read that your blog gave you “the opposite feeling of depression, and that is expression” is a stunning and powerful revelation. It’s a testament to how this act of writing is not a hobby, but a lifeline—a “balm” and an “outlet” that has honed your voice and given you back to yourself.

    It’s incredibly inspiring to follow your journey from the essence of poems to the structure of screenplays and back again. It proves that the core of the creative spirit is the same, no matter the form. It needs to return to its wellspring to make sense of the inner life.

    Welcome back to your poems. We are here, reading, ready to receive the awe you so generously wish to share. Your words are indeed a safe haven, and this post felt like one. Thank you for this gift.🙏🏼

    And I, for one, will be one of the first in line for that poetry book. The world needs it.

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