[81] Tenderly She Watches Me Burn

so tenderly
i burn
you watch me on the television
a spectacle for you
detached because the fire can’t harm you
but i showed you this trick before
when you were busy getting mesmerised
by others

later you realised what it meant
when it was too late to collect the ashes
you wish i were a phoenix, i wish too
a paradoxical wish to be with me and not to
continuum of hasty decisions resurrecting gloom
we ended like sleep, only to wake up again

complications arise in a mess of feelings
that range from madness to madness
a madness that tries to contain your affection not love
that tries to convert your affection to love
in the end the disquiet of an illusion remains
whether this moment of affection from you is sacred or not
to let this be or let it not be.

3 thoughts on “[81] Tenderly She Watches Me Burn

  1. This is a beautiful poem. I hope you don’t mind if I make a small critique? Just to make a small intro for myself, I’m a member of WDC (writing.com) and we all critique each others writings to make each other better writers, poets, etc.

    With that said….the only comments I have are for the last line in the second stanza “wake up again”. The word up is an unnecessary addition as we all understand once you wake.

    The second line in the third stanza of “madness to madness” is a bit off putting. Not sure what to do with it. And my only other comment is the use of affection so often in the last stanza. I understand where you’re coming from, just seems a different word could be used.

    Now, all this being said…As I mentioned before I began, I did indeed enjoy the poem itself. It reminded me of a relationship I recently had. You colored the words just right, they flowed well. And I know I’ll be coming back to read more of your poetry.

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